Ready For It?
by Relena for President
Summary: Heero Yuy experiences separation anxiety. One-shot.


"Hey man, you good?"

Heero narrowed his eyes at his partner before abruptly turning away. He pushed a full magazine into the handle of his pistol and couldn't help but smirk at the satisfying _click_ he heard as it locked into place.

"Yeah." Heero tossed a glance over his shoulder, frowning all the while. "Why?"

Duo huffed and rolled his eyes. "Oh, please. You _know_ why."

The Preventers hangar was a blur of activity and Heero didn't want to waste any time answering what he viewed as pointless questions. Especially when the rest of their team was already onboard the shuttle. Heero had been tasked with doing a final check of their weapons arsenal before takeoff.

He rolled his shoulders and turned back to face his partner. "For the last time," Heero said tersely. "I. Am. Fine."

Duo sighed and jammed his hands into the pockets of his olive and black Preventers jacket. "Yeah, yeah. I get it. You don't need any help and you don't wanna talk about it. As _usual._ " He drew out the last word in exaggerated fashion. "I just thought, ya know, ya might want a little support, or advice. Or _something_."

Now it was Heero's turn to roll his eyes.

"Considering you've been up to your elbows in shit." Duo chuckled.

Heero turned on his heel and strode wordlessly to the waiting shuttle, effectively ending the conversation, ignoring the flurry of activity around him. He was done talking, and listening. End of story.

Unfortunately, Duo was slow to pick up on social cues.

"I know what I'm talking about!" The braided Preventer yelled to Heero's back. "You may wanna listen now and then… ya might actually learn something!"

Heero continued to ignore Duo as he boarded the shuttle. He likewise ignored his fellow Preventers, most of whom were a few years older than him, but lower in rank, as he took an open seat near the back. And just to drive home the point that he didn't want to chitchat, he stuck in a pair of earphones, selected a screeching heavy metal song, and cranked up the volume on his phone. He closed his eyes and listened to the blaring music until that song ended and the next one began. He wondered idly what the holdup was and why they weren't preparing for takeoff yet. _Duo's probably still screwing around,_ he thought bitterly. _Ass._

He opened his eyes and stared straight ahead at the back of the seat in front of him and managed to avoid sighing out loud, although it was a bit of a struggle.

He'd been doing that a lot lately. But then maybe he was tired.

Still, sometimes he'd find himself annoyed at the sheer level of incompetence displayed by his fellow agents. Especially one agent in particular. Especially when they'd been doing this job for four years. Four years was time enough, he thought, to learn to suck less.

 _And he thinks I can learn something from him..._ Heero scoffed out loud. _Please._

And yet a small voice in the back of his head had the nerve to remind him that there were some matters where, yes, Duo Maxwell _might_ be the expert. Heero would grudgingly admit that after the fact. For now, he would continue to be pissed off.

His temper only barely ebbed when, finally, Duo entered the front of the shuttle, with a duffle bag slung over one shoulder. In his hands he carried two styrofoam cups, and the strong scent of coffee wafted down the aisle. Duo caught Heero's eye from where he stood and grinned. Heero blanched and turned his face to look out the window, down at the activity in the hangar below. Groups of agents were still milling about and Commander Une was in the center of it all, appearing to bark out orders. Heero had received the details of the mission hours before, but still didn't know what all the fuss was about. They were all headed to a colony within L4 to immobilize what seemed to be a fairly standard threat. Heero considered it to be more of a fact-finding mission and wasn't overly concerned, and yet the Preventers were in full-blown terror alert mode. He figured Une was just being extra-cautious. All in all, he wasn't worried.

And anyway, there were always plenty of other things to worry about.

"Thought you could use some java." Duo gave Heero a blatant wink as he approached the seat, holding one of the steaming cups outward. "Get it? Java? 'Cause Trowa?" He threw his head back and guffawed at his own joke.

"Yeah. Got it." Heero reluctantly accepted the cup. At the very least, it could serve as a handwarmer. It was January and Brussels had been blanketed in fresh snow overnight, although inside the shuttle the temperature was tolerable. But temps had hit below freezing that morning, and it was still early in the day.

Heero lifted the coffee cup to his lips and took a slow sip of the hot liquid, savoring the robust flavor that lingered on his tongue. Maybe it wasn't so bad, after all.

"No offense…" Duo started as he dropped in the aisle seat next to Heero's. "But you look like you haven't slept in, like, a year." Heero eyed him warily. Duo returned the glare with an easy smile. "What's it been? Like two months, maybe?"

Heero took another sip of coffee instead of answering. Once again, Duo ignored the non-verbal cue and clapped Heero on the shoulder.

"Aw, buddy, I wish I could tell you it gets better." Duo sighed heavily. "But nope. It gets _sooo_ much worse."

"Uh-huh." Heero clutched his coffee cup a little tighter, careful not to squeeze it too hard. No need for _both_ of them to end up covered in the boiling liquid.

"Frankly, I'm surprised to see you back at work so soon," Duo pressed on. "I mean, you probably coulda sat this one out, ya know? Pretty sure we coulda handled it…"

"Uh- _huh_." Heero let out a low exhale, his irritation mounting. It's not that he _wanted_ to go…

Actually, yes. He did want to go. He wanted to get out of the house. But he didn't want to be made to feel guilty about it. And he had a feeling that's where this was going…

"But can _she_ handle your taking off like this?" Duo waved his pointer finger in Heero's direction. "I'll bet the little lady's _peeved_."

Heero crumpled his coffee cup, which thankfully, by then, was empty. "That's none of your goddamned business."

Duo splayed both his hands and laughed. "Dude, I get it. Relax. It's not that big a deal. I'm just concerned about Relena, is all. Ya know. As a friend. As _your_ friend," he added pointedly.

"Relena's fine," Heero said automatically. "I have to work. She understands." She of all people understood. Just a few days ago, Heero had had to practically pry her laptop out of her hands…

" _But it's cold," she whined as he returned the computer to its bag._

" _Huh?" He looked at her as if she were losing her mind. All that sleep she was missing out on, he wouldn't have been surprised…_

 _She pointed at the laptop bag. "My computer is_ cold _," she snapped. "It's never cold. It's always hot. Hot because I'm using it… because it's_ meant _to be used." She stamped her foot in further protest. "I just need to check my email. Just for a minute."_

" _No."_

 _Her eyes rolled skyward before she batted her lashes playfully at him. "Oh, come on. Pretty please?"_

" _Nice try." Heero strode away with the confiscated computer, determined to stash it somewhere Relena would never find it…_

It's not that he was trying to be a controlling jerk; it was just that Relena had time off to use, and he was determined to see her use all of it, for once. She needed the rest, or else she wouldn't be up for returning to work when it was time. As always, there was a method to his overprotectiveness.

He wasn't thinking of just her, any more, either. And so if one of them needed to go back to work early, it was going to be him.

"Hey, wait a second…" Duo bolted upright in his seat, craning his neck to look past Heero and out the shuttle window. "Is that…?"

His question lingered in the air as Heero whipped his head around. When he followed Duo's line of sight, the seemingly permanent scowl on Heero's face deepened.

"What the hell…" he muttered as Duo chuckled.

"Well, hey, whaddya know?" Duo tore his gaze from the window and grinned slyly at Heero. "Speak of the devil…"

Heero cursed again under his breath as he shot up from his seat. "I have to go," he growled. He kicked at Duo's legs. "Move."

"Sheesh, fine! You don't have to _assault_ me." Duo slid his legs out of the way, but Heero was already ambling over him. Heero bolted down the shuttle aisle, not caring if he plowed into anyone in his path.

His heart was thudding wildly in his chest as he burst out of the shuttle and quickly descended the stairs, practically leaping over the last few steps onto the hangar floor.

Her back was turned to him. She was chatting with Une as if they had all the time in the world. She didn't even seem to notice him as he approached. Heero had to wonder if she was there on official business, or just to try his patience.

"Relena." He cut into her conversation with Une, not really caring that he was interrupting. They were past the point of politeness, now.

She glanced over her shoulder and met his eyes, eyebrows arched, as if she were surprised to be bumping into him.

"Oh, hello, Heero." She smiled, and it had the effect of daybreak on a cloudy summer day. Which Heero was determined not to fall for. Not this time.

"Why are you here," he said through gritted teeth, working to keep any warmth from seeping into his tone.

"I brought you something," Relena said cheerily. She turned around fully, and Heero's eyes widened in horror as they focused on her chest. Which had a baby strapped to it.

Their baby.

The two-month-old boy was bundled up in a hooded onesie that looked like a baby snowsuit, gaping up at Heero, his blue eyes wide and luminous. Part of Heero was pleased that his son's eyes had retained the same color from birth; aquamarine, like his mother's, although he suspected they would start to darken soon. That, along with the boy's dark shock of hair, made his parentage plain as day.

Which was dangerous, for all of them.

" _Relena,"_ Heero hissed, glancing about the hangar at his fellow Preventers. Several had stopped in their tracks and were looking over at them. "Are you nuts? What are you doing here?"

She rolled her eyes as she stood bouncing their son slightly in the baby sling. She shot Une a knowing smile before returning her gaze to Heero. "That's up for debate. Anyway, I _thought_ you might want to say goodbye…"

Heero frowned at her. "I already did," he said, keeping his voice low. "This morning."

"Yeah, with a note!" Relena was making no effort to keep her voice down. "You know that stopped being cute about two years ago…" She rolled her eyes again. "And anyway, our son can't read yet, remember."

"I thought we agreed to keep that quiet," he grumbled. "So what are you doing?"

"Oh, please." Relena took one hand off of the baby so that she could flap it in the air dismissively. Their son's eyes followed the movement curiously. " _Every_ one here knows..."

Heero folded his arms over his chest as he glanced from Relena to Une. He detected a slight crack in his commander's otherwise stony facade; he could've sworn one of her hazel eyes twinkled at him from behind her glasses.

"That's not the point," Heero glowered. "You shouldn't be out parading him in public."

Relena matched his glare. "I went directly from the house to here. I have hardly even been _outside_ in two months, Heero. You knew it was bound to happen eventually, right? I'm going back to work in four weeks. And anyway, the secret is out," she added. "The press, the public all know I had a baby, even if they don't know who his father is." So far, they had managed to keep their two-year marriage secret from the media, but Heero didn't expect they would be able to hide their relationship forever.

As if on cue, their son cooed and reached his arms out toward Heero. Relena smiled sweetly.

"Oh, you want Daddy? Okay..." She unstrapped the baby sling and handed Heero their child. He gingerly took the squirming bundle from Relena, careful to keep one hand under the baby's buttocks while the other supported the back of his head.

"And I don't think it's fair that _you_ get to leave but expect _me_ to stay home and sit around all day," Relena continued with a huff.

"It's for your safety," Heero countered, tipping his chin downward. "And his." The baby gurgled his agreement, which Heero quickly realized were spit bubbles, soaking his work shirt.

"And that's why you left us with a fleet of bodyguards, all of whom _insisted_ on accompanying us here." Relena's eyes tightened. "I understand your need to protect us at all times, Heero, I really do… but _six_ of them? Really?!"

Heero glanced back over to Une, who merely shrugged.

"Can't be too careful," he muttered. Une smirked over at him.

"You know those guys are all on your dime, right? I'm not paying a bunch of agents overtime to babysit..."

" _Exactly,"_ Relena said, her cheeks darkening. "Besides," she said to Heero, "you know I can handle myself."

"Right," Heero sighed.

Relena's sky blue eyes had gone to steel. "Was that sarcasm?"

"No."

"We talked about that tone…" she warned him in a sing-song voice.

"Relena," Heero cut in, "I'm telling you, infants don't register sarcasm-"

"They pick up on more than you think," Relena shot back, gesturing toward the child in his arms. "I told you, I don't want that rubbing off on-"

"Heyyyy, little D-man!" Heero's shoulders tensed at the sound of Duo's voice booming from behind him.

"Do not," he growled without turning around, "under any circumstances, refer to my son as 'D-man.'"

Relena sighed. "Heero, really, of all the things to get upset about…"

"Yeah, man, lighten up!" Duo sidestepped Heero and reached over to ruffle the baby's hair. Heero took a protective step backward.

"Watch it," he snarled.

" _Dayummm,_ you're uptight." Duo strode over to Relena and slung an arm around her shoulder. "What's up with you, Mama? Here to try to talk some sense into this spouse of yours before he abandons you for the next week?"

"Not at all," Relena quipped. "I'm only trying to guilt him a little." The two shared a boisterous laugh while Heero glared at them both.

"Don't worry, I'll make sure he gets back to you safe and sound," Duo said. "I can't promise there won't be some heavy drinking in the interim, though; I need to let off a little steam myself."

"How are Hilde and Helen Marie doing?" Relena asked.

"Good, for a young mom and her little demon child." Duo heaved a sigh.

"Duo!" Relena gasped. "That's terrible."

"Yep. It is. And _that's_ why they call 'em 'the terrible two's,'" Duo countered. He waved both his hands in the air excitedly. "I'm serious, guys. Helen's a freaking banshee spawned from the hellmouth itself. It's like Lucifer dropped her off on our doorstep with a note that said, 'Haha, good luck. See you in sixty years, suckers!'"

To Heero's surprise, Une burst out laughing, clutching at her sides. Duo joined her, and even Relena giggled. Heero just stood gaping at the three of them as he held onto his son.

"Yeah, I don't get it, either," he murmured to the baby, who merely burped in response. Heero gave his back a few gentle pats.

"Now come on, Duo," Relena was saying once they'd all calmed down. "It can't be that bad…"

"Sure it can." Duo shuddered. "You guys don't know how lucky you are to have a boy. I'd _kill_ for a boy."

"Really?" Relena's brows shot up in surprise. "I thought girls are _supposed_ to be easier…" Heero could immediately tell from her tone that she was mocking him.

"Lies!" Duo squeezed his eyes shut and clamped both hands over his ears. "All lies…"

Relena and Heero exchanged glances. Heero realized his expression must have softened, because now his wife was smiling at him again. She sidled up to him and gently jabbed her elbow against his.

"Are you still angry I came here?" she asked softly, peering up at him through her long, dark lashes.

"No," Heero grumbled. "But I'm not happy about it."

Relena clucked her tongue. "You are going to have to learn to _relax,_ " she said, "just a little. We really will be fine while you're gone. Please don't expect me to stay caged up forever. Okay?"

Heero could almost feel himself relenting, but he tried to fight it. Competing for his attention was the prickle of panic that seized his chest. It was the kind of jolt that made him want to grab Relena and grasp her tightly to him. In fact, it was that same urge that prompted him to pull her in and kiss her for the very first time, nearly five years ago…

She was watching him closely, her entrancing blue eyes pleading with him, sending him reeling. "Heero…"

"I need you safe." He allowed a hint of emotion to cloak his tone. Just a little. It was the closest he could come to expressing his anxious feelings to his wife without being able to hold her close; and anyway, his arms were full.

Relena's gaze was warm and empathetic. She laid a hand on Heero's arm, which was braced against their son's back.

"We'll be safe," she assured him. "I promise. Now, please, try not to worry." She gave his arm a squeeze and laughed. "Usually you're the one saying that to me…"

Heero glanced up from his wife as Une came up beside them. "I'm sorry to interrupt, but we really have to be going." Heero nodded at his commander.

"One minute."

Une gave him a curt nod before turning back to Relena. "We'll stay in contact as much as possible." She reached over and gripped the young Vice Foreign Minister's shoulder.

"Of course," Relena said with a firm nod, her smile staying put. "Safe travels. And good luck."

As soon as the commander had turned her heel and strode toward the shuttle, Relena's smile faltered. Heero couldn't help but frown at her crestfallen expression. Their eyes met again over their son's head, and it was clear Relena was reading his thoughts.

"I'm sorry," she started. "I'm fine, really…" But even then, her eyes misted. She quickly reached up to dab at her tears with the cuff of her coat, laughing in spite of herself. "Must be the hormones, still…"

"Hey, it's gonna be fine, babe!" Duo appeared behind Relena and gave her shoulder a squeeze. "I told you, I'll keep an eye on buddy boy here."

Heero glowered down at Duo. "Do you mind?" he sighed. At last, Duo seemed to pick up on at least one social cue.

"Right." He grinned at the couple sheepishly. "Sorry, lovebirds. I'm outta here." Duo gave Relena a quick hug. "See you in a week, Princess! Have fun with my favorite nephew." He leaned toward Heero and tickled the baby's stomach, earning an eruption of giggles from the infant. Duo laughed right along with him.

"I will. You be good," Relena said, wagging her finger playfully at Duo.

Duo snorted. "No promises…"

Heero watched as his partner bounded off toward the waiting shuttle then turned back to his wife. He could see she was putting up a brave front, smiling through her tears. And Heero could feel something within in him starting to break.

"Well…" Relena kept that smile coming in full force as she stepped closer to Heero, their child in between them, and placed her hands on either on his shoulders. "This is it." She tipped her chin up, her gaze unwavering, even as her voice trembled. "I'll miss you." She glanced down to the baby, then back up to Heero. "We both will."

Whatever was bending inside Heero, whatever emotion it was that was on the verge of breaking, snapped. He could feel the force of it, like a sharp, stinging pain, straight through the heart.

"I'm not going," Heero said abruptly. Even as the words left his lips, he didn't quite believe them.

"Wait. What?" Relena blinked up at him, her eyes gradually widening. "Heero…"

"I won't leave you," he said more quietly, jostling the baby in his arms. "Maybe it's too soon. Maybe I'm not ready."

The shock slowly left Relena's face, and her features relaxed. "Heero, you're ready. I know you want to get back to work. It's okay." She gently squeezed both of his shoulders. "I'm sorry if I made you doubt, or feel guilty in any way. I really didn't come here to do that. I just wanted to see you off. That's all."

Her words were almost enough to convince him. Heero gave an uncharacteristic sigh, relenting. "Yeah. You're right."

"See?" Relena gave him another reassuring smile. "I _promise_ we'll be fine. We'll try our best to keep all the bodyguards entertained." Her smile turned into a little smirk, her eyes dancing up at Heero.

"You won't leave the house much, will you?" Heero asked warily, apprehension roiling his gut.

"Only if it's absolutely necessary," Relena sighed, acquiescing. "We have plenty of food at home and I can get help if I need it. Only from appropriately vetted sources," she added quickly, just as Heero was opening his mouth.

"Thank you," he said, smiling for the first time that day. He turned his attention back to the baby in his arms, pulling back the hood of the onesie just enough to lay a soft kiss on his infant son's forehead.

"Be good for your mother, Dex," he said in mock warning. He brightened as the baby let out a fresh peal of giggles.

"Of course he will be," Relena cooed. "He's perfect."

Heero nodded his agreement before carefully handing Dex back to Relena, helping to secure him in the sling across her chest.

"All right," he said once the baby was snugly in place against his mother. "I'm going now."

"Yes." Relena nodded. "We shouldn't keep them waiting any longer." He saw a flicker across her face, another glimpse of her sadness. Heero knew that look well. He'd seen it before rushing into battle, or more recently, any time he had to leave Relena for long periods of time due to his demanding schedule with the Preventers. She had always taken his absences in stride, understanding perhaps better than anyone when it was time to answer the call of duty. But this was the first time he'd left her since Dex was born.

Things were different, now.

Heero felt terrible at the thought of leaving but hadn't allowed himself to face it. He'd forced the guilt down as far as it could go, and realized his stomach had been in knots all morning.

 _I can do this,_ he reminded himself. _Relena's strong. She can handle it._

And then, fully aware of the onlookers lurking on the intimate scene, Heero cupped Relena's face in both of his hands and kissed her soundly. She kissed him back with equal pressure; he could feel the tension in her body as she braced for his touch and returned his affection. It was tempting to linger, but they were out of time. The kiss was quick and firm and Heero knew he could do better, but he would have to make up for that the next time.

"I'll see you in a week," he murmured as their faces parted.

"Right. It's only seven nights." Relena smiled up at him again. "Now get out of here before Une fires you."

Heero gave a snort and broke away. His footsteps felt like lead as he backed up and turned toward the shuttle. Turning his back on her, walking away from the woman who had upended his entire world when he was just a war-ravaged youth, who had stayed by his side and bore him a child, frightened him more than he knew was possible.

It was the hardest walk of his life.

 _Get it together,_ he chided himself. He wished he were embarking on this mission with Wufei instead of Duo; at least he could count on Wufei to call him a weakling and remind Heero to stuff down his emotions where they belonged for the duration of this assignment.

Right now, he could use a reminder.

Heero passed a group of agents who had lingered in place for a little too long, watching him say goodbye to Relena. He made sure to lock eyes with each of them in a long, withering stare as he approached the shuttle steps.

"Any of this gets out… I know where to find you." The group exchanged worried looks with one another before scattering. Satisfied, Heero bounded up the stairs and into the shuttle.

Entering the shuttle aisle, he spotted Une in one of the first seats, tapping on a tablet and scowling. Heero avoided meeting her eyes as he made his way to the back. Whatever was bothering her, he didn't want to do anything else to provoke her ire.

When he reached the same row of seats he'd been in earlier, he found his partner had taken the window seat.

"Move," Heero barked.

"Hey! I was just keepin' it warm for ya." Duo grinned as he bolted up and made room for Heero.

Heero settled back in his seat and turned his attention out the window. Relena was still standing there, bouncing Dex lightly as she stared up at the shuttle. Somehow, their eyes locked across the distance. She must have been watching Heero the entire time as he boarded to see exactly where he sat. Unconsciously, Heero pressed his palm flat against the glass, splaying his fingers. Relena likewise lifted one of her hands, palm facing his.

" _Awwww,"_ Duo cooed from beside him, elbowing him in the ribs. "Heero, you old softy…"

"Duo?" Heero glanced over his shoulder at his partner, keeping his voice low and calm. Duo's goofy expression vanished.

"Yeah, man, what is it?"

Heero's eyes tightened. "Shut. Up."

* * *

A/N: _OH HEY GUYS. Yes, I'm baaaaaack ;) I've missed all of you! How are you?! How's life?! Let's catch up!_

 _So, obviously I survived my wedding and am settling into newlywed life. I am just about ready to dive back into updating my current WIPs, but I couldn't resist posting this little one-shot (within another Taylor Swift song for a title 'cause I'm dorky like that). I hope you enjoyed it! It's always fun exploring the softer side of Heero (within reason). So far I plan to keep this as a one-shot but since it is a sort of prequel to_ Under the Roses _, there's always a chance I could expand this. #DexForDays_

 _Anyway, I have an idea for at least one "bonus" scene so let me know if you'd like to see more!_

 _So happy to be back!_

 _Hugs!_

 _\- Mrs. Darling_

 _P.S. Shout out to Scarlet Eve and Mistaken-Miracles (my action consultant and parenting consultant, respectively) for their editorial guidance on this story! Since it was my first 1xR fic in a while I felt a little rusty, but they both took the time to read this over and give me feedback... and quickly, since I started this yesterday. Thank you, ladies! ;)_


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